Marisa Murgatroyd was a stranger to me. Until this past September, I didn't know who she was or her mission through Live Your Message. She was a stranger to me because I had yet to step fully into my purpose. I had spent the last 5-years of my life being a full-time stay at home mom while running a successful mental health private counseling center during naptimes and evenings.
I had been a business woman for the past 9-years and created a company that survived not one but two 4-month maternity leaves. The business was like the little engine that could and kept plugging away as if on auto pilot. What a blessing and how grateful I am for that. Yet I felt empty and like I was standing still.
Stuck in the stillness of always waiting. Waiting for my husband to make more money so I could reinvest into growing the business. Waiting for my 2-children to grow older and enter kindergarten and preschool so that I would then have the hours in a day to devote to build a new business more aligned with my true calling. Waiting for my turn to start living my dreams.
Staying at home with our children was a choice and a core belief that I have had since before I even found my husband. Yet, 3-years into being at home and 2 kids later and I ached for more. That small whisper that started 2-years ago---telling me that my purpose in this lifetime is to help empower others to speak their truth and reclaim their self worth as the birthright that it is---had grown into a booming megaphone echoing in my ears. My body, soul, and mind ached. I ached and yearned for more. I ached to step fully into my purpose. I ached to be set free to grow.
That's when I met Marisa and the Experience Product Masterclass. It was then that I took a calculated risk to leap. I took the leap by fully committing to the 8-weeks of the masterclass, but what I was really doing was committing to my true purpose and to stop waiting because by waiting I was doing a disservice to myself, my children, and the women I am meant to serve. So
I sat my husband down, told him what I was doing, and from that moment forward every Sunday night we would sit down after the boys went to bed and we would map out our schedules for the week so that I could create the time and space to live my message instead of waiting for the time and space to come to me.
The 8-weeks in the EPM was INTENSE in every glorious, intimidating, exhilarating, and overwhelming sense of the word. From the pre-training modules of niching. Lord, how I hated that word and had such resistance to the concept of niching down.
Yet, with the help of Christine and Marisa and the lesson in front door and back door I realized that combining my core value of connection through relationships with my core value of self worth that it birthed the niche of Relationship Empowerment Coaching.
The concept of combining my skills as a couples therapist with my superpower of believing in and empowering people was so simple yet I needed EPM to get there. From that moment, it all clicked and the pieces dropped into place. I could see the mission and the vision with such clarity that I became empowered myself. I dove head first into product creation. The ideas and excitement flowed like a raging waterfall.
Then, the marketing model came and I was no longer the flowing waterfall but was being tossed around in the raging rapids down below. Learning how to "sell" the value of self love in relationships and myself as a brand was completely uncharted territory to me. Boy oh boy did the uncertainty and insecurities rise. Where there are insecurities the overwhelm is soon to follow.
But like the good little type-A student I am I diligently pushed through even when I wanted to crawl in my bed and binge watch movies instead. I even put my own flare and fun into it when I decided to do a Halloween chatterbox campaign while handing out candy at a local church. That is a story fit for a sitcom episode in and of itself.
I did what I have done my whole life and I fought through the uncertainty by doing---by staying in action--by fighting---by hustling my ass off to the next check mark--by pushing myself until the finish line.
I fought through the insecurities by venting my frustrations to Christine, by allowing myself to cry tears of frustration and fear of failure, and then I picked myself back up and kept moving forward. Because if I fight hard enough and if I have done everything on the checklist then I will have earned the reward at the end. I will have earned mission accomplished.
You see, what I learned through these 8-weeks, actually came as a result of me NOT achieving mission accomplished despite my fight and perfect checklist. I owe this most valuable takeaway (and honestly life changing) aha moment to this course and the I'm Powerful bonus with Jeffrey Van Dyk. Jeffrey spoke about how there are people that live in fight and there are people that live in flow.
My story (actually my family's history modeled, labeled, and talked about as the family curse handed down through generations) is that life hands me shitty cards and I have to fight to get what I want because when I fight only then have I actually earned it. He goes on to say that people that live in fight believe the universe is against them. That when you shift your mindset to the universe is with you and you live in the flow of action then that is where you can truly find peace, fulfillment, and success.
That truth bomb unlocked my deep rooted limiting beliefs that I have to fight for everything because the universe is against me. My pattern of fighting for what I want on the timeline I want it only causes me pain, burnout, and resentment. Holy shit!!!!! I realized from this experience that the real truth is that the universe protects me (and has been my whole life) from choices/outcomes that do not serve my best self at that moment.
I realized I haven't been fighting external obstacles, but I have been fighting against the universe. Holy shit!!! The universe just keeps taking my punches, kicks, screams, and curse words because the Big U can handle it and it knows it can take the beating to protect me and until I learn the lesson of TRUST. Trust and patience that I will fulfill my purpose, I will serve others, and I will have financial abundance in divine timing. Life changing new truth and fits my soul like the key to a lock.
In the end, I invested in something bigger than the version of me I am right now. I invested in my future self. I invested in the people I am here to serve and assist. I invested in my children's future by modeling for them what it means to live your dreams. I invested in my marriage by fulfilling my needs instead of looking to my husband to do it for me or to grant me permission.
I invested in the person I am destined to be. I invested in my growth. I invested in uprooting limiting beliefs. I invested in learning to live my life in flow, to have faith, to trust the universe always protects me, and that I AM UNSTOPPABLE!!! I will be forever grateful for this experience for my business and self.
My name is Sarah Madras from Raleigh North Carolina
I'm the owner of an Esteem Builder's Coaching, where I help couples to free themselves from unfulfilling relationships and cultivate fulfilling relationships based on self love, communication and getting their needs met without all the arguing. My inspiration for going and starting Esteem Builders Coaching was that I had already been doing private practice work as a licensed relationship therapist and so I had been doing the one on one work and I just kept seeing the same patterns over and over again. Couples were coming to me because the thing they crave the most was connection. They just wanted to feel connected in their relationships and they wanted their partner to understand them.
And for them to be able to say, "they get me", and to have that exhale moment and throughout the process of seeing all this I realized that same theme and what was stopping them from having that true connection was that feeling that they are not enough. That they weren't smart enough that they you know weren't successful enough to please their partner and to get that connection and get that understanding that they couldn't communicate well enough or they couldn't, like, fight fair and so that whole feeling of I'm not enough and that there's something must be wrong with me is what was stopping them from really having that authentic connection with their partner.
So that's why I decided I wanted to have a greater reach by creating programs that were easily accessible to people around the world not just one on one like a couple coming into my office. And so that's when I started Esteemed Builders Coaching and was creating programs in it to have more of a global impact.
Why does my work matter. Oh my work matters to me because it allows me that freedom within my own family and the freedom to be able to stay home with my boys as well as be able to live my passion and my calling. So it's the best of both worlds. So I struggled a lot with the dilemma of this feeling, this need to have to choose between one or the other of either being a mom or being an entrepreneur and a business owner.
And I always felt like I have to put it off or I'll have to keep waiting or I'll wait for them to be in school. And it felt like I was having to put my life on hold and that was creating that resentment inside me that restlessness and was actually making me not as efficient and loving as a mother.
And so when I realized that the two things didn't have to compete with each other anymore and that they could be collaborative and exist at the same time, that is when I realized, okay this matters to me and I can both have a fulfilling career and and help serve people and change lives and change other families and I could also change my own family by having my needs met as well as meeting the needs of my children.
So why do I think it matters to couples that I work with it is because it's a game changer of instead of coming home and having a spouse where you feel like it's more of a roommate situation where two people are just kind of going through life like this rather than going through life connecting as a team, it shifts the dynamic within a family and so when you grow up in a family where there is a team and when they are connected and when they have healthy boundaries and when they feel like they can speak their truth and say how they feel and what they think and have it be a loving place to do that, that has ripple effects throughout the whole family.
It changes the way that the parents interact with the kids, it changes the way that the kids interact with each other and it's modelling that for those children so that when they have relationships of their own and get married they have healthy relationships as well where they feel fulfilled and they feel understood and appreciated.
What was your business like before taking EPM?
So before I signed up for EPM, everything felt like a struggle. I felt like I had to fight for everything that I had. I felt like I was always hustling or always behind the eight ball because I was trying to juggle being at home full time with the boys. I was trying to juggle the private practice and I was trying to create this fulfilling business you know to create that larger global impact. And so I just felt like I'm fighting fighting fighting and I'm a hamster in a wheel rather than getting somewhere.
And so with EPM I learned the language to use I learned how to find my--what they call niche--and so find my niche and I had been resisting that so much I had been resisting this whole niche down and make it smaller because my heart's desire was to help free everybody I wanted to help free everyone and so why would I turn someone away if they weren't a couple.
And I realized through EPM the importance of knowing what your message is and knowing where your super powers lie because that's where you can have the greatest impact in people's lives. And so that's what EPM taught me is not just the marketing and the product creation but it taught me to really step into my own truth so that I can tap in to those core super powers at helping people feel, seen, heard understood and valued and being able to use that to help the couples that I work with.
Why did you decide to join EPM?
So I decided to join EPM honestly because I was ready. I knew I wanted to create a product. I knew that what I had been using in my private practice for the last 12 years I knew it worked because I saw the evidence through all the, you know, hundreds of clients that I had worked with. So I knew the techniques that I was using worked.
And I thought well if I just packaged these same exact techniques and package them up and then deliver them out to the world, it could help the masses versus waiting for that one couple to come into my office and we go through all the techniques together and things like that. I knew hey I have something that works because it's worked with couples for the last 12 years. So why not package that in a way that makes it accessible to everyone and it can have a greater impact.
Were you concerned, were you worried about in investing in EPM?
Honestly I was not concerned about investing in EPM. One because the person who recommended it to me I trusted completely and I had taken courses and I had taken a class with her and met her. And so I trusted her recommendation and also in full disclosure I wasn't concerned because EPM offered a guarantee.
And so I felt like hey if I take this leap and I put myself out there and I do all the work, I still have a safety net at the end. And if something happens and it doesn't go the way that I had planned that guarantee was my safety net. And so with that thinking and that place, I didn't have any concerns.
Tell me about your experience in going through EPM.
So my experience of going through EPM was intense. It was a roller coaster ride of emotions. And one second I was up riding the high of I found my message and I have my, you know, my mission statement and then it was the the the lull and the crash of oh my god it's time for the marketing component because to be honest with you and the marketing component scaring me to death.
In social work school and grad school we weren't taught how to run a business or how to market like I had never taken any marketing classes. And so that was such an entirely new concept to me. And so it was intimidating and it was overwhelming.
But the beauty of EPM is that. They honor that space and they say to you, I know this is new. I know this is overwhelming and I know this can be intimidating and that's ok, it doesn't have to be perfect you just have to be present. You just have to be present and keep taking action.
So abundant action, after abundant action; inspired courage after inspired courage. And that's what you do to keep building on the program. And so that's what I love about it is the support that you got along the way. And they didn't minimize, you know, your experience they didn't minimize the intensity t,hey honored the intensity of it, while offering you that space of support and encouragement.
What was your favorite part through EPM?
What was my favorite part through EPM? It was fun. Like Marisa is, she's a little quirky and funny and like she'll be playful and so with that with overwhelm you have to balance it out with playful energy and so that was a great mix. And so we were allowed to play and have fun and you know where silly hats or glasses or you know just be silly in the zoom and have those moments or there's something about earning those wins and earning that chaching that is motivating of like I want to earn the next one and the next one.
And so it was fun because you were creating connections with the fellow people in EPM. You were getting to know their stories you were getting to know their products and why it was important to them. And so it drew you in on not just your product but you were cheering for each other, like you were interested in their mission just like they were interested in yours and so it created that balance of that fun community with the intensity because you guys were all going through the same thing at the same time.
What was your biggest break down in EPM?
My biggest break down in EPM was probably trying to balance it all because EPM was right around the holidays and managing two children and just trying to keep all the balls in the air, that was probably the biggest breakdown is maintaining the intensity of the workload and the schedule.
It was so packed full of knowledge and information that you wanted to take it all in. And so it was kind of like, like if you're floating down a river and then all of a sudden the river opens up 10 times and now the river is like these raging rapids and you're like but I still want to catch all the gems while I'm going down the raging rapids.
And so you're reaching out of your boat and you're like I want to catch this gem and I want to catch this and you're just trying to get them all even though the water is going faster and there's ten times bigger of a river for you to go through. And so it was that exhilaration of am I going to catch all the gems along the way.
But the beauty was like we kept forgetting that EPM is with you forever. And so even if you missed one of the gems while you're wading through the river I can jump back in the EPM website and I can listen to any one of the trainings a hundred times if I want to. I have all the worksheets like everything's on there for you forever.
And so you can always start back up at the top of the river and start floating back down and pick up more gems every time you're going down. Every time you create a new product you just go back through the system and you're like, oh that's something that I missed the first time around and I want to use that to make my product even better.
What was your biggest breakthrough in EPM?
I had two big breakthroughs. So the first one was the realization that I didn't have to fight anymore that I could actually just take that leap of faith and I could jump into the flow. And then when I stopped fighting is actually when things started to flow towards me. And so I think I had been fighting and hustling for so long that I was somehow created this cycle of repelling things to come to me.
And once I just released that and took the leap of faith that it was going to be okay and it was going to work out and like as long as I stayed true to my calling like I know this will be okay. Then opportunities started flowing to me and it opened up that space and allowed that to happen.
So for me that was a huge breakthrough because I have spent my life being a fighter, like I've had to fight for all the things that I've gotten successes or you know these benchmark places that you check off, I've always had a fight to get there. And so that was a life changing breakthrough for me. Realizing that you don't have to fight or hustle that you can just be in the flow and be open to those opportunities that come to you and that when they come, receive them and then take that courageous action towards them.
The second breakthrough would probably be in regards to my niche and really embracing that calling and knowing that this has been who I am throughout my whole life and that growing up when my parents would punish me for being friends with all the kids instead of you know just the kids who are making good grades, like that was my superpower because I value everyone equally and I didn't say oh I can't be friends with them because they don't make good grades or I can't be friends with them because they don't live in as big as house as we do or their parents don't make as much money, that I value everyone equally.
And so instead of seeing that as being something to change and alter, that it was something to embrace and to use with working with couples and to value each couple that came into the office and value each story and value each truth that they spoke to me is to give that value and hold space for them.
So being able to embrace that niche of working with couples and helping them to speak their truth and embrace their power so that they can connect with their partner in that more that deeper fulfilling way, rather than the surface because we go through life trying to please people. We want people to like us, that's natural.
And people in relationships, they especially want their husband or wife to like them. And so they end up pleasing that person. And when you're pleasing that person rather than being truthful about your thoughts and your feelings and your needs, eventually it starts to erode the relationship and it creates that disconnect because you're not being honest with who you are or what your needs are or what your thoughts are.
And so it brings you further and further apart. And then that's where they start to feel like strangers again. Or when the resentment builds up, I'm tired of saying yes all the time when this whole time I wanted to say no. And so it's giving them permission to speak their truth kindly and unapologetically about what they think, feel and need in their relationships. And so being able to embrace that niche, opened the floodgates of possibilities.
So tell me how did you feel when you went through those breakthroughs.
So honestly the first one when I realized oh I don't have to fight, I kind of felt like, 'Yeah this must be crap', like this is that woo woo stuff that all these successful people are talking about and preach but they don't know my life, they never had my experience and that's not going to work for me.
Like honestly that's what I thought was going to happen. And I was like but I'll give this a try. I've been doing it this way for so long and it hasn't gotten me the results I wanted. Might as well give something else a try. And so I released and I took the leap and I was like, let's see what flows to me.
And then I was like oh my god there is all this evidence of gratitude and of things flowing to me and of the universe having my back and of opportunities and successes like that's flowing to me now. So when I was able to shift my mindset to find the evidence to support that it was happening, that's when I felt relief. It felt like freedom. It felt peaceful like I'm so much less stressed and having so much more fun now like I enjoy it now. I'm having fun. I'm not yelling at my kids as often because I'm stressed out about trying to make the business work and wanting it so bad it's not happening.
I'm letting it flow so that I can be more present when I'm with them so that I can be more present when I'm working with my clients and trusting that this is going to happen. It just may not be on my timetable or in the way that I envisioned it and that's the big key as I always envisioned it in this one little constrictive way and when I let go of that picture and realized and open myself up to it can be whatever way it wants, then speaking opportunity came to me, then the opportunity to be a published author came to me.
I never thought that after EPM I would be a published author and speaking on stages but those things happened because I stopped fighting and took the leap and opened up to the flow and trusted that okay we'll see what happens. And it happened.
So how did you like working with Marisa?
So what I love about her is she's kind of a kindred spirit in that she walks like what if she is going to say something, she's going to walk it too. Like she's not the chick who's going to talk the talk and not walk the walk, if she talks the talk she walks the walk. And I love that she will call you out. Like she's not going to BS you. And she'll do it in a way that shows love and nurturing but she's not going to let you get away with excuses. And so that keeps you focused and that keeps you in line with your mission. And I appreciate that.
Like if I am getting distracted by the next shiny thing and it's taking me off my mission I want somebody to say, you don't need to worry about that now, get back on track. And she is that person that will do that. And she also is playful and funny and she's willing to put herself out there and be goofy and I appreciate that vulnerability. So when somebody is being goofy and silly and showing themselves that is their vulnerable part. And to me that's a gift. Vulnerability is a gift. And so I feel honored that she's willing to give that to her students. And I appreciate that.
So what is your business like after EPM, you kind of already said that but you might have more.
So my business after EPM is fulfilling. It is enjoyable. It is fun. It is passionate. That is how I feel about my business after EPM it has a direction. It's just it's more calm and peaceful and there's less struggle. There's no need for struggle. And so my business after EPM, like those are the intangibles, like the internal ways of how I feel about it.
And then the tangible things is that now I'm an international best selling author. That now I'm out there speaking on stages and getting my message out there to the masses. That now I am more courageous in my message, I'm more confident and concrete about who I am in my destiny and purpose in this world because of the direction of EPM and how it just really is so concrete that it bears it down, like here it is.
And so that's where my business is now. It's full of direction, full of passion, full of purpose, full of emergence and expansion like this everything that lights me up, so it's lit up. Fierce and on fire. It's lit up it's fierce and on fire right now.
How have your mindset changed after EPM?
So my mindset has changed after EPM that it's not in a fighter mindset anymore it's in a flow mindset and so trusting that success will come and not trying to plan the exact how, when, where and exactly how it will look like but being open to all the possibilities that come and knowing that success can look many different ways and that success can come at the time you never thought that they would.
So instead of being like oh it's the holidays so don't run a program then, you know, that's putting limitations on your business. And from EPM I learned don't put limitations on your business. Don't put limitations on your success and just trust that if you open yourself up to the possibilities that you can find the evidence of it coming back to you.
So I have always grown up as a fighter, like it has been passed down to us. We have this whole what everybody calls the family curse that literally has been passed down from generation to generation, where things don't just come easily, you have to fight for what you get.
And that the family curse, if it's going to happen to anybody that's going to happen to us to the point. Let me give you an example. The house that we're in, it took us three years to find this house and three other homes fell through. And we were working with a realtor the same realtor and we looked at one house and I was like, can you believe that this happened again? And she was like, yeah because if it's going to happen to somebody it's going to happen to you. And that felt like it was perpetuating that family curse again.
At that I have to fight for my dreams to come true. I have to fight for my dream home and not give up and be persistent and resilient and work at it for three years rather than giving up after the first two houses fell through. And so I just decided I don't want that to be my story anymore. I don't want that to be my truth anymore. There is no curse. And I realized that what I had been thinking was a curse was actually a blessing and was actually the universe protecting me.
And so the first house that falls through the 540 highway is going through the backyard. So the universe is protecting me from living in that house and having a highway in my backyard. The second house that fell through, we found out that there--we lost a house by $100 mind you, we found out that there was something wrong with the house afterwards.
So the universe was protecting me from that. Where I thought the universe was like against me and was like ha ha ha you have to fight for everything you get. And then I realized, no the universe is protecting me from all these things.
And so each time I've been battling and fighting the universe saying give me what I want, give it to me when I want it and exactly how I have it pictured in my head and the universe was like you can keep yelling at me you can keep swinging and kicking and punching. I can take it. I'm the universe, I can take it because I know what's best for you and I'm actually protecting you. I'm steering you and making you have a dream deferred because this dream that I have for you waiting for you Sarah is even better than you could have ever imagined.
And the same thing happened with EPM. As I was fighting through EPM and I thought I have to fight and struggle to get my program out there, I have to fight and struggle to get people to sign up for my program. And success is only going to look like mission accomplished in the timeline of the seven weeks and if it's not that then it's a failure.
And so throughout EPM I was fighting fighting fighting until I had that aha moment of wait a minute, I don't have to fight because the universe has had my back this whole time, it's not a family curse, it's been freaking protecting me from stuff and I just have never realized it.
And it was protecting me during EPM because it was saying you know I have this other different dream for you. I have a different dream of you being on stages, of you doing you know group sessions through your happily ever after program. I have dreams of you being an author and doing book tours. That's our dream for you Sarah.
And so that is the big mindset shift that I had in EPM, that it wasn't that I had to fight or that the universe was against me. It was that the universe was protecting me the whole time. And if I just trusted it released and jumped into the flow and let the river of the universe take me to where I was supposed to be going that that destination was going to be far more fulfilling, magical, just spectacular than I could have envisioned for myself.
And so now I just kind enjoy like laying in the raft in the river and be like okay universe, I'm open, what do you have for me next? And so each day I just take action inspired action and I'm open to that.
How much money you have made during the EPM?
So during EPM, I was one of the ones who did not meet mission accomplished. And so I was one of the ones who checked all the boxes and got all my chaching chachings and had all my XP points by the end of it and didn't have the zeros in my bank account to match it. And so what happens when that happens and EPM is again like I looked for the evidence of what did I receive from this and what I received from the program is a crap ton of knowledge that I never would have gotten anywhere else.
And I receive continued support from EPM in order to help me reach that goal. And so even though my bank account within the program didn't change, my intangibles of my bank account with my brain, my bank account within my heart and the support system that I continue to receive after EPM to help me get to that goal, that to me has been priceless.
What's the most incredible thing about having an online business or experience product.
So to me the most incredible thing is the freedom and flexibility that it provides. The freedom to be able to be in every one of my kids functions, to not have to miss, you know, any basketball games or any T-ball games. To be that person in their life that is creating that foundation and it provides me the ability to support them financially and the ability to support my family emotionally. So to me that's the perfect combination.
Tell me about the impact that you're having on your clients or customers through your work.
The impact that I'm having on my customers or clients through my work. So I'm making them or I'm helping them make themselves stronger. So and it kind of makes me giggle like the example that just popped into my head is that I had a client say to me, she was like my husband said I've been seeing you too much and I was like oh really why is that? And she said because he says I'm getting stronger and I'm not saying yes all the time like I used to.
And it made me giggle because people become stronger and they become more confident in who they are and what they want. And so they're more likely to speak their truth and say hey no wait that's not OK with me; hey wait that is a boundary for me. And so they're changing the rules of engagement. And so the other people are lives like, wait a minute, this used to be so easy. I used to just get my way all the time. I used to be such a pushover. And now you're stronger and now you're telling me how you really feel.
And honestly, at first, there's resistance to that. Like people don't like change. They like having what they want when they want it. Like who would want that system of change? But then when it changes and they realized, oh but now, I get to connect with you more. Now our sex is better because you're actually attracted to me because you like me and you like yourself like,
Awesome! And so they start to see the benefits of, wait, when my partner is strong that inspires me to be strong and then we can be strong together. And that makes us a stronger power couple. Like that to me is what a power couple is. It's when you have two strong individuals who are standing within their truth and who are being honest about who they are and who are maintaining their boundaries and showing you how best to love them? That's a power couple right there. That's when you have that true deep connection.
And you know, everything gets better when life gets easier. When you know the rules of engagement. Then it's just easier. You don't have to second guess it. When you say something to your wife, is she going to yell at you? Or for men, if they express how they truly feel, is your wife then going to say you know suck it up be a man.
Like it creates that space for both individuals to be who they are, to be vulnerable because in order to have connection you have to have vulnerability. And so it allows that vulnerability to have that connection. And so it just makes life easier. They're happier, they're more fulfilled, they're arguing less. They're enjoying each other's company more, they're having more fun, they're having better sex.
Like they just feel, like I had a client tell me once, here's a great example: He had been coming to me for a few months and you know it was just not feeling very confident and wanted to work on himself and wanted to create that foundation of self-love.
And through our work together, he went to a bachelor party and before he said I would have been really nervous of like, you know am I going to get along with everybody, am I going to be one of the guys, is every bit, you know, with that whole nervousness of are they going to like me. And he said I went there, I had a great time, I never worried about that crap, and he was like and never once did I think about cheating on my wife. He's like even though you're in this atmosphere of bachelor parties and wooh!
That he no longer had even the temptation or the desire to do anything that would jeopardize the relationship with his wife. Because through his growth and it made him closer to his wife. And so it decreases the probability of infidelity. It decreases the probability of betrayals, decreases the probability of divorces.
So what are the benefits? Not getting cheated on. What are the benefits? Not getting a divorce. What are the benefits? Actually liking your spouse and having fun and enjoying them and wanting to be around them. Because a lot of couples out there go through life just existing with their partner.
You know once the magic fades and life gets real and it's about paying bills and raising children and you know figuring out finances like sometimes the magic starts to fade when you're dealing with real life stuff and so it's being able to reconnect and get that spark of magic.
That's why the program is called Happily Ever After formula. It's because it's the formula to get back to your happily ever after rather than two roommates simply existing and just getting along. Everybody wants a deeper connection than that. I mean you're with this person forever. You might as well have a deep connection and enjoy the time that you're with them.
What kind of lifestyle you have right now?
I feel so bored. I was like amazing jet setter who was like traveling the world. No I'm at home. I know--I'm at home. Damn Facebook envy. So my lifestyle is I get up. I take care of the kids--well actually that's not true. I get up, I take care of myself first. I do my meditation and I do my morning rituals of my Oracle Cards stuff like that. I take care of the kids get them ready and then I work on my business when they're sleeping or at a, you know, a grandparent's house or on the weekends when my husband's here and I serve clients in the evenings or via zoom or Skype during time.
So my lifestyle feels a little mundane when I think of it that way. Is my lifestyle important to me? Yeah. Honestly, sometimes I feel like a frickin bad ass. Like I'm like Jesus Christ. I'm raising two small children, I'm keeping them alive, which some days that's all you can do.
So I'm keeping them alive. I'm teaching them and moulding them to be socially and emotionally skilled because to me that's the most important. And I have to teach them their educational stuff. Kids you can't send them off to kindergarten unless they have those skills.
And so part of me is like damn I'm a badass! I'm doing that, I'm running another business and I'm running two friggin' businesses while I'm doing that. So sometimes I feel like, oh I'm lame and mundane and like this is what I do. And other times I feel like I'm a freakin' bad ass look at what I'm doing. So I guess it all depends on the day. So in all honesty that's my lifestyle.
So did your lifestyle changed after EPM?
So my lifestyle has changed after EPM in that I'm much more easygoing less stressed more relaxed. The way, the image that comes to my mind when I think about it, is literally before EPM I felt like I was like this. And I was like white knuckling it all the time like run from this task to this task and get this to do list and check this off and did it. And it was like this all the time.
And after EPM I just feel like I'm kind of like OK we'll get done what can get done. And we're doing the best that we can and that's okay. And trust in that it's all going to work out. And so it makes me a more patient parent. It makes me more patient with myself. And it makes me serve my clients better because I can be more present with them in the moment rather than thinking of the 10,000 things that I have to do in order to achieve X Y Z goal. By the end of the day.
What would you say to someone who is considering EPM?
I would say it was definitely worth it. Totally worth it. I would say to trust your intuition and if you feel like you're ready to take the leap, then do it that you won't regret it. I would say if you're half-assing it, then don't do it because what's the point of that.
So if you're going to do it, be all in and be committed to not just your business but be committed to you because as entrepreneurs, like we're not our business but we are a business because our business doesn't make us but our business is an extension of us and so if you're going to half-ass it, like don't put half-assed work out there because then that's just a reflection on you.
And so if you're going to be in it, take the leap, do it and you won't regret that you did. But be committed to it. Be committed to yourself.